Monday, December 31, 2007

Counting down the Hours Until 2008

Well here it is. I know some of my amigas on the East Coast only have a couple of hours left but her we still have almost five hours remaining. The kids are running around...one hyped up on mountain dew the other just hitting his terrible twos. Hubby is taking a nap so we can countdown to midnight together. My best friend here in the springs already called and wished me a happy new year...yet here I sit with a little sorrow.

I am saddened thinking of what has been gained and lost this year. I lost family members which I realize I never had to begin with. A sister is supposed to be bonded for life but I have learned a mans appendege can cause a woman to turn her back. A father who is supposed to love unconditionally can turn his back because of a man a daughter chooses to love. Life can be miserable and yet it can be short. I also lost my father to a fight that could have been prevented. If only those years he had listened to the doctors. If only he would have protected himself with his infidelities. I know his liver was damaged by a disease that a .25 rubber could have prevented. An uncle and aunt who think they are holier then thow have now lost a neice instead of embracing newfound family. They will feel their sorrow one day when they too realize all that could have been and how we could be family. Oh well, we live we learn

I learned life also has its beauty. The beauty of a child's smile. The loyalty of a son. The warm hugs and kisses is all it takes to make me happy. The warm embrace of a man who loves you and makes his world yours after all this time. This is the true meaning of life.

Yes right now I live in a 2 bedroom apartment. I work as a Stay At Home Mom. I know to a lot of people I may not seem to amount to much. You might even call me trashy for a lot of reasons. I am raising my children. They will have positive memories to associate with me. To be perfectly honest with you all, I will accept my children alway. They can marry or not. They can be homosexual, bisexual or heterosexual and I will still embrace them. They can marry african american, caucasian, hispanic or asian or heck even extra terristial, they will be my children. I love my babies and their happiness is all I need.

So tonight on this new years Eve I am making this resolution. I am going to tell all those who wish my family harm or do not agree with the way I live "Screw You". I am sick of living for everyone else. My family and I's life is the most important. My children are healthy and they continue to amaze me. Stop hating and live life as full as you can people. Life is too short. Once it is gone it is gone forever.

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