Wednesday, April 30, 2008

What I would love for Mother's Day!

I would really love to win One million dollars but realistically since I don't play the lottery that is not happening the closest that I will see that money is bushes stimulus package. LoL.

Mothers day is very hard for me. I know its supposed to be about you as a mother but I always look back and reflect on my mother. I miss her daily. I hear my hubby talking to his mom on the phone and I miss that bond so much. It amazes me. Before I became a Mexican by marriage I did not think much of dear old mom, but when I see his relationship I long for so much more. When mom passed on in 2004 I swore I would celebrate each mothers day honoring her the way she deserved yet I am lacking.

This mother's day. Money willing of course I am making plans. I will take the children to seven falls and walk the path I walked with my mother before they were born. I will release a green balloon into the sky to remind myself she is still watching. I will enjoy my children and also mourn her in silence. Life is hard without a mother to advise you. I wish I had relished every moment in time with her. I wish I had never muttered the words I hate you as a child.

Life is hard without her but I will keep moving forward. My children carry part of her. They always will. So for this mothers day I wish for her. I wish she knew my children. I wish for lots of things. Realistically I know what will happen. I will get a warm bath and tough steak and lots of tears. For mothers day just give me that well deserved break and a peice of sausage.

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