Sunday, March 29, 2009

A lesson Learned the hard way

I was not going to blog about this but someday I want to look back on this day and reflect the lesson I have learned.

This weekend was going to be a hard weekend. I could pretend it was not going to happen but it was inevitable. My love was going to Denver to hang at a Nuggets game with his compadres. I was reluctant to let him go but he needs some free time as a man and I need some personal mom time. Plus the seats were incredible and at a good price.

My hubby left the house at 300 to meet his friends at a designated meeting spot. I really did not care at all. I walked to Target and bought the kids some shoes and a juicer plus some snacks. I then came home and picked up the remote. I tuned into the nuggets game and dvred it so we could dvd it later.

The game ended around 945. I was stoked my husband would most likely be home by midnight. I took a shower and got all gussied up. I walked in the front room to blog and checked my email. It was there....the dreaded email. "Baby the guys I came with want to hang out a little longer...a couple of hours? I will keep you updated."

I became upset because he promised he was leaving straight after the game. I know it was out of his control but I knew in my heart of hearts this would happen. I emailed him back sobbing how unfair it was for me to be stuck with the kids until whatever hour. I told him to answer the email and tell me how long.

After many hours worrying and many lost tears my husband finally came home at 4 am. I was livid and gave him the silent treatment. We talked for almost an hour and came to a couple of conclusions.

1. It was his fault for not driving himself.

2. I was justified being upset

3. I was not justified for blaming him

4. He was truly sorry.

We are learning from this experience. When he goes out again he will not rely on anyone for
his ride home in the future. I also will be patient and remember he is not intentionally hurting me. I also realized I need to take time for myself or I am going to go mad. Life is too short to always be on the defense. My husband is loyal and after this post I am going to pretend this day never happened. He wants it that way and I concur. We will continue to thrive in our marriage and learn from our little mistakes. We are human and we will make sure we are more considerate of each other.

4 Comments / Comentarios:

Tara said...

Next time Big Ro plans an outing, plan a night for yourself! Even if its at home, just pamper yourself a a movie, get the kids in bed, make yourself some little snacks and enjoy the peace and quiet! Take a bubble bath, paint your nails, chat on the phone or read a good book. Planning something for YOURSELF while Ro is out will give you a reason to look forward to him going out instead of worrying.

It sounds like you and Big Ro have good communication which is essential to have a strong marriage!

Heather said...

Glad you wrote about it, it really helps to let it all out. I would have just gone to bed and called it a day, weather it be 12am or 4am, its too late anyways, go to bed. My hubs is always late getting home but usually its due to delayed planes, he will get home when he can, no need to stress the small stuff. Happy you all can move on.


Adrians Mama said...

I have to agree with the previous two posters...although i know its easier said than done...

Crystal said...

I'm so glad that you worked this out and that it ended so well.

I would have been very upset and livid if my husband didn't come home until 4am in the morning.

It's great that the comunication lines are so open in your marriage. That is key.

Hang in there, you guys will work it all out.