Cosleeping a good thing?

Well we have been cosleeping with our kids and usually stop when they are ready. Roana stopped when she was 4.5. But Lil Ro is driving me insane. He naps with his daddy and then does not want to sleep at night. I have to tell you Conan O Brien's hair looks like Something about mary's hair when she put the special gel in her hair for prom. He kicks and cries if you get too close and lately he needs to be in the middle or he rolls off. It is driving me nuts. I miss having this night tim to myself. I miss hugging my husband or waking in the middle of the night for some special one on one time. I do not know how Vegas is going to be. I got to get my bed back. Yes I know its not that long but what if he is one of these kids that cosleep until 8 or 13? Scary thought there. RIght now today cosleeping is bad for me but ask again tomorrow when I am not sleep deprived from watching late night commercials and most likely it will be all good again. Any advice is welcome.

Random thoughts of the day

Why are there no firefly's in Colorado? When I was a child in Ohio I used to love catching fireflies and put them in glass jars until they die. I dreamt of me and my children running outside chasin them but here where I am at no where to be found. One day I will chase them and hopefully my children don't think I am crazy when I chose too.

Dog's are a lot of work. I love my dogs do not get me wrong. I love the look of love in their eyes and loyalty. I love how they can find such joy as little toys. But cleaning up after them yucky.

Why does time fly when you are having fun? It seems like just yesterday mother in law arrived. Now here on Saturday we will be saying farewell once again. I miss her around but why does time crawl when you are bored and fly when you have fun?

I am in love. As I yelled at Rogelio he looked at me with those deep brown eyes and turned his head. I forgot what I was mad about. I could think of nothing but kissing his luscious lips and crawling in his arms. I am in love or a big softy.

Children are a blessing. When they fight I want to rip out my hair but that one word Mommy can still melt my heart. To get that beautiful picture they drew just for you makes it all worth it. I wish everyone could have the joy of their children.

Life is good. Even when I am down and out. It could always be worse. I could be homeless. I could be dying. I could be....almost anything. But I am happy. Thank god I found happiness in this life even if I am griping about it sometimes.

The last weekend with my lovely Mother In Law

This weekend was wonderful. We went to our local park that has a huge lake in it. I took pictures like crazy as I want my kids to remember this time with their grandma. We played fetch with the dogs in the water and took a quick stroll around this park. I am so glad we shared this time with mom. I know she is happy and I am going to miss her terribly when she goes. I hope we can go to California in a few months and bond more. I am so blessed to have her in my life.

On Sunday we made tamales. We stayed home all day and laughed and laughed. I talked to her about her past. I learned so much this weekend. Who her kids fathers were. How many girls Ro was serious with. How life was in Mexico. I am going to miss her so. I am crying like she died. I already miss her and she is right next to me. I am blessed. I am happy. I am loved. Thank God for my mother in law.



Just one stroll around the park. That is all

I want lay by you in the sea. I wanna stay like this forever. Until the sky falls down on me.
She looks so pretty in this light.
I can make that shot ma. I can do it.

Ma needed a break.
Reflecting on time to come and time that has passed.
Yes dear?
I wanna swim too!
She sure is my glam girl.

Why am I so teary eyed?

I swear I am not one of those women who cry at a drop at a hat. Every time I look at a wedding picture or invite my heart breaks. Ro and I had a beautiful private wedding. I would never take that back. It was just him, the minister and I. I wore a off white dress I had from graduation and he wore the best clothes he had. We were young and in love and at the time it seemed so right. Now that I am 28 friends of friends are getting married and I see beautiful long white dresses. I see flowers and music and I cannot help but think what if. I was researching chapel information in Vegas to renew our vows and honestly the thought flew threw my head. I pondered it but in reality right now is not the time to renew our vows.

We have been married 9 years and they have been wonderful but I now want to appear to be the blushing bride. I am going nuts. Hopefully next year. We said 5 but things came up now we say 10. Time will tell. I know, I know the most important thing is we are in love and married. I guess every girl has her dream wedding. One day Ro will give me mine.

So that is my sob story today. Enjoy these pics from our wedding.

I am fuming right now

The dog jerked out of the leash and cut my leg. The baby was screaming and people stared at me like I am psycho and I am on the verge of tears.

We are going to vegas. I was so happy as I thought I would get to meet a good friend of mine. Well hubby said No. He said we are going to be too busy with family to meet them. I hope she forgives me and that next time I go we are still welcome. I am sorry Angy.

Then I am exhausted. Last night I stayed up looking for the gps. Well I found it thank goodness. Under the counter where it should not have been. I was crying and freaking out. Thank goodness my mother in law knows how it feels to be a woman. LOL I lose almost everything. I am terrible with things. Hopefully I can improve.

My sister in law is doing good right now and the whole situation puts Big Ro in a bad mood. I hope it is just his time of the month or I am screwed. Also we got news today that ones of his coworkers husband passed away. My heart is breaking for her and I wanted to send her an email but Ro said it would be better if I did not. What is this world coming too? Oh well just a low day on this roller coaster. Hope everyone else is having a semigood day.

The End...well to some things at least

So Rogelio busted his knee again playing last week so no more kickball for rest of the season. Hopefully next year. I am sad as I enjoyed having this day to get out and cheer my man on but cest le vi. He is sad too but its not fair to him or the team to sit out and take up valuable bench space.

My mother in law is with us for the next two weeks. It is really nice to hang with her and have her help. I miss the days when we lived together every day. I am weird I guess. I get along with my mother in law. I always dreaded having one and now I dread the day I am without her.

My sister in law is gone. She moved to Mexico this weekend. We said our goodbyes this Saturday and my heart hurts. I am strong for her because she is so positive but I am going to miss my beautiful nephews so much. I regret fighting with her over the stupid stuff. I hope she finds what she is looking for. I wont talk much about that cause my heart hurts.

Rogelio and I had a semi date tonight. We went and grabbed taco's. It was very nice to chat instead of screaming No Ro every couple of seconds or dropping our food to chase him out the door. We are going to try to have a regular date this next couple of weeks but time will tell if that happens. We need adult time to bond. We are very lucky to have each other. Life is OK here in our little home. Just a little down right now. But I know as long as we stick together. I gotta go Roana just socked Lil Ro and I see blood. The joys of parenting.

Our first dinner without terror

My mother in law told us go enjoy dinner and pick up some things for her from walmart. I had to take Roana but we sat and could actually savor the flavors of the food for a change. He behaved pretty well according to mom but the mother in me made me feel guilty and miss him like crazy. I hope Rogelio and I take advantage of her offer once again when she offers. Hopefully this time no Roana. Only time will tell.

On a side note we are going to Vegas. I booked my Hotel Room last night and we will be heading there on the 18th and will leave on the 20th. Yes it is going to be a quick visit but I am so excited. Last time we went we came back with our extra souviner. Lil RO. A divine miracle would have to occur if we bring back another. While we are there we are going to enjoy In & out and hopefully meet one of my online friends. Time will tell.

My sister in law is gone. She moved this weekend. Far fat from here. Hopefully when she arrives safely I can update. My heart is breaking but I am happy for her.

So that is it. Hope all is well. I am off to spend time with family.

The Best Fourth of July Ever

We went to Denver like I mentioned and did not expect it to be very good. Sometimes we argue or sometimes they argue but to my surprise we all got along. My sister in law and I stopped at Sam's Club, we bought bratwurst, chips and some sodas. Then next door was the liquor store. What is the fourth of July without a little alcohol? I bought some bud light with lime and we headed home. I stuck the brats to boil and they were delicous. My sister in law and I had a great time. We laughed and teased our husbands. Then we got a big box of poppers and threw them by the handfuls on the ground. We wanted fireworks. The boys said no. We called them boring and went to the stand anyway.

We ended up getting 60 worth of fireworks for 20. First round was a blast. Ro-N screamed and Roana hyperventilated. We needed more. So off for round two. This time the lady was great. She gave us 80 worth for 20. The next day we had to come back. I hope all our fourths are half this good.

We had a blast but it is not a fourth I will forget for awhile.

Today I recieved a sign

My family is going through so much right now. I was feeling really down today and questioning my parenting skills. My daughter is sick and I was stubborn so now we are paying for it. I question a lot why God is putting me through all he has in my life. Why did he take my mom? Why did he make my father resent me? Why did he make my family hate my husband. I was thinking a lot when we pulled into a parking lot. The lightning flashed and the thunder rumbled. Quite fitting for my mood. I then looked to the right of me and saw this:

I then thought of this verse I learned in church: Genesis 9:13-15

13: I do set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a covenant between me and the earth.

14 And it shall come to pass, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow shall be seen in the cloud:

15 and I will remember my covenant, which is between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and the waters shall no more become a flood to destroy all flesh.


I think it was God's way of reminding me he will not give me more then I can handle. He will not let me suffer or fail. I will get through this if I keep all faith in him. Yes right now it is rough but through him I will become a stronger wife and mother. I really need to find a church and I think my daughter getting sick was the wake up call I needed.

We may go to denver tomorrow and spend some time with my sister in law. One day soon hopefully I can tell you all that is going on but for now keep us in your prayers.

By the way. I made up with my sister. She called me in the hospital sobbing. I told her I will talk to her however the moment her husband does or says anything inappopriate I will cut them off again. Noone and I mean noone hurts me or my family again. Have a great night all.

An update to Roana

So we went to the doctor today and talked to the doctor. Her oxygen levels are still kind of low so we are keeping her on the nebulizer and oxygen for another week. She loves it though and dread when they finally take them off. Also she was missing two shots so the doctor poked her. I think she cried more when that happened then the whole time in the hospital. Keep us in your prayers.