One day Closer

Tomorrow is going to be a good day. Why you may ask? Well for one it's Friday and I adore Fridays. That means the following day we get to sleep in. We get to plan outings. We get to be a family. Tomorrow is going to be a test of my trust. Big Ro is going to that get together. I have to motivate myself not to bother him there. As he will be with a bunch of coworkers and I do not want to embarass him like I have in the past. I must have faith that he is loyal. I know he is. He would never cheat on me. We have 10 years together now and well you know we were each other's first. He is an honest man and he truly loves me with his whole heart. He even sends me love notes on my myspace. I think I have it pretty good. So please forgive me if tomorrow I am on IM worrying or biting my nails. I will need the support thanks to my parents.

Speaking of them...I realized a lot of things about them in the last week. I loved them do not get me wrong but they sucked as parents. My grandmother and I were on the phone talking and she said I remember when you were a skinny little thing. I said I know it all changed when they worked opposite shifts. She did not understand what I meant. My parents did not have food in the house what so ever. The had goverment peanut butter, pork, cheese, mac and cheese and tuna and of course Diet Pepsi. I to this day do not understand how my sister and I survived. I think it was asking people for money to go down to the corner store to buy bbq fritos. I then explained to my grandma that up until we moved in High School my parents never cooked at home. The only time we had a home cooked meal was when we went to my grandparents home. She was shocked but I had to tell her the truth. My sister will vouch and she can correct me if I am wrong. My parents sucked and should have been trained better or should have required a license to take us home. Oh well....plus did I mention we would get beat when we took one of their "pepsis"? No wonder I have such issues with my food and weight. May they rest in peace only God can judge them now.

I have no real plans this weekend. I am thinking of maybe doing something next weekend for Ros birthday. My man is turning the big 33. I swear this will be a great day. I am thinking if the weather is nice driving up to Denver and staying in a hotel. It is up to him. It is his special day not mine.

I am missing him a lot right now. Is that so wrong. I think we just completed week 3 of school and I am so lonely. I miss my better half. I miss hearing him breath and even playing his xbox 360. I miss his scent and his eyes and his voice. I am constantly reminding myself this is better for all of us and very temporary. Its not like he is gone forever or we are divorcing but I still miss him.

My daughter is doing fantastic. She is learning to share with her brother but unfortunately since he has grown a little more she thinks she can abuse him too. I think the kid that picked on her last year has started again this year. The funny thing is we know his uncle but Ro tells me to ignore him because the child has a crappy life. The picking on part thing hurts me more then it hurts her. Funny how that works.

Oh look at me I am babbling on. I should go get ready for Ro to come home. If I dont post again for the weekend hope you all have blessed days.